The Modest Proposal
Taking the out of control American youth and truly making
something out of them
Statistics estimate that in the year 2013 over 70,792 teenagers
were in juvenile detention facilities. Those are young adults who continue to
waste their talents and dwindle down their futures. Many psychoanalysts and
therapists agree that teenagers in juvenile detention facilities are more than
likely to become worse and even more destructive in their futures. We need to do
all that we can to protect these children from becoming unproductive burdens to
society. We at least owe it to our future generation to do so. My proposal is
not just beneficial to our future generation, but also to ourselves as well. Out
of control teenagers could be used for many versatile functions and would help
bring our economy out of debt.
Firstly, the use of teenagers for my modest proposal would be
for their youthful and soft skin. That’s why for my modest proposal I propose
that we truly “make something” out of the badly behaved youth of America. Unlike
mature adults, teenage skin doesn’t have a wrinkled and dry texture that
constantly requires attention. On the contrary, many would believe that
children’s’ skin would be a much better fit for my proposal because of their
extreme softness and smoothness; however children’s skin lacks the availability
that teenage skin has. One average sized teenager would make at least 2 purses
or a pair of nicely made boots. And two teenagers of a large body size could
make four trench coats that could be worn by both men and women to keep warm
during the winter. These coats would be extremely popular during the winter
season since the human skin and muscle acts as an excellent insulator to keep
warm. These coats could be marketed all over the world and could be given to
help the homeless.
Secondly, my proposal would be beneficial because it would
increase the nation’s revenue and save many American families money. This
solution would be successful with parents because it would allow them to save
money instead of having to spend it on out of control teenagers. Statistics
calculate that the average cost to raise a child in the United States is around
$241,080. That’s money that could be used for parents to take a well-deserved
vacation, buy the car or home of their dreams, or further their education. My
proposal would also benefit the nation and allow the United States’ revenue to
increase from the sales of the teenage products. Without wild and out of control
teenagers the United States could use the estimated $88,000 per year that’s used
to fund juvenile facilities on something far more useful. That’s money that
could be used to help the country out of the recession and out of the growing
national debt. It’s estimated that United States government is over
$17,273,488,616,875 in debt to other countries.
All in all, although many may feel that my modest proposal is a bit
“unorthodox” or “strange”. And that using out of control teenagers’ skin to make
shoes, purses, coats, etc may be a bit extreme. I do believe that it would
greatly benefit the entire country and would benefit the greater good of
humanity. It would
provide more money to the government that could be used to help underprivileged
and poverty stricken Americans with beneficial welfare programs and health care.
The most important factor of my modest proposal is to not think about what our
country can do for us, but to think about what we can do be for our
country.